So self esteem….pretty much one of the biggest things people struggle with, especially girls. At some point in their lives, everyone has felt bad about themselves, thinking they aren’t good enough, attractive enough, etc. Up until a while ago, this was a huge struggle for me; I legitimately hated myself. I wouldn’t let myself ever think I was good enough for anyone, for anything. Anytime people would compliment me on something or say anything positive about me I would immediately tell them how they were wrong, how I’m not pretty, not good at this, or good at that. I would try to convince them how much of a ‘loser’ I was, when I was really just convincing myself of this. It wasn’t until I was having a conversation with my best friend and he complimented me on something I had done. I started to protest right away and tell him that he was wrong and I didn’t deserve the praise when he pretty much just yelled at me “Why won’t you just let me compliment you?!” That kinda hit me like a ton of bricks. Why wouldn’t I let people compliment me? Why was I always putting myself down and making myself feel sick about who I was? Telling myself I’m not beautiful, I’m not smart, I’m not talented….This wasn’t who I wanted to be and it wasn’t who God says I am. After that, it was all a perspective change. Forcing myself to see myself differently, how God sees me. Being honest, it was one of the hardest things to do. I was so used to putting myself down that building myself up was a totally foreign concept to me. It took awhile but I was finally able to feel good about myself, who I was in myself and who I was in Christ.
It’s different for everybody, and getting over it is different for everybody but some things that always helped were:
- Tell yourself. As stupid as it sounds just looking in the mirror everyday and saying “I’m beautiful, I’m smart, I’m talented…” helped soo much. Our words are so much more powerful than we think and speaking positive things really helps to change our outlook.
- Leave reminders for yourself. In every school book I would leave little sticky notes saying positive things like “You are a brilliant human being” and “Smile, you’re you!” so literally every moment I was surrounded by positivity.
- Know what God says about who you are. So many verses helped me with my self esteem but my favorite is Proverbs 31. Some people view these verses as things a woman is supposed to be, but I just started speaking them over my life and saying that this is what God days I am, this is how he sees me.
- Know you’re not alone. So many other people deal with self esteem issues and for me, that made it so much easier to cope. Our problems seem so big when we feel like we are the only one who deals with them but knowing other people feel the same way helps so much.
I hope this can help someone or at least be an encouragement 😉 anyways, stay brave!